e petition to free me from impotent rage.

Ever been Incandescent With Rage? It needs capitalization.
IWR.
There are many causes:
Billions (not millions, billions) of pounds been paid out in housing benefit to incomers from EU countries. Sharia law being declared in what was once a good working class neighbourhood.  The possibility of Formula One being shown only on Sky. Prisoners having 'human rights' and playing the X Box 23 hours a day. People not supporting 'our troops' in the 'war' in Afghanistan.
A characteristic of the 'rage' in IWR is that the sufferer is actually impotent to act on this rage in any meaningful way. They might kick in the TV, or beat the dog, or the wife, or the kids when things that were beyond their control annoyed them. Or they could even explore alternative outlets like decking someone in the pub or joining a fringe neo nazi organization.
But the times they are a changing! Now when you're in the grips of IWR you need no longer suffer the concomitant feeling of it being an Impotent Rage. Because now you can create an E PETITION! https://submissions.epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/new
The other night I was sat at my computer, IWR (and an  impotent rage it was brothers!) at the thought that some smug cunt wanted to rekindle the debate on capital punishment. Even if we in the UK do not enjoy the privilege of living in a Secular Republic at least the state couldn't murder us. (Not in a predetermined manner, only if you got in the way of it's tools). What made me rage even more was that the fool in question had appealed to the lowest common denominator in wanting it brought back for child killers (if the child is killed in the line of duty, apparently. oh yeah, and for people who kill cops?).

The wannabe imitators of this petition are riotously funny. One twit has asked for the 'reintroduction of  capital punishment for capital offences'- which of course do not exist in the UK as we have no capital punishment.
 Of course, many decent upstanding folk want to hang the local kiddie fiddler or drug dealer. Why even bother with the judicial process?
Nice to see this ones doing well, tho. Twice the number of signatories as Mr Staines' twisted effort: http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/1090
One day pricks like this will get the  Totalitarian Fascist Dictatorship they deserve, but until then its either piss your knickers cause you don't rule the world you muppet or start an e petition!.